She says, Hey, Rhett, I think the hair on the side of your head is almost all WHITE! I am aware of this fact. I acknowledge that as the days go by my hair loses more and more pigment. And I am not happy about this. It doesn’t bother me, but I like my beautiful brown hair. But, Rhett, it’s really getting gray. I mean like, in the past year, it has changed drastically. OKAY! Leah, I get it. Okay? I have grey hair. Do you hate me? Am I ugly to you?

So Leah says to me, she says, Hey, Rhett, I think you have gained some weight. Then she squeezed my love handles! Oh, Leah! I’m so sorry. I know you started working out, all hardcore-like again, but I am busy working in an office all day. I can’t do my leg lifts in the middle of the office, jeez! Plus, I haven’t gained any weight. My figure hasn’t changed. Sure, I can stick out my little belly a bit further but that’s just my body restructuring after the wedding, right? No, baby, you have definitely gained some weight. You have “filled out more”. You were more toned, but that’s when you were playing soccer.

So it’s happened. My hair, while gray, has been mostly brown and my weight has been the same since I was 15. I don’t know how much I weigh, but she’s probably right and there is more gray hair. I have gotten old and fat. My youth is gone. My strength is gone. I will just go into the wilderness where I will diminish.

Yah right! I am so hot! Did you guyz even see those hawt pics the other day:

Maybe I will start sculpting my guns though.